Motherhood is a mixture of sunshine and thunderstorms. Moments of bright joy and moments of flowing tears. Our children mean everything to us and we would do anything for them. We love them, we protect them, and we make sacrifices for them.
It feels good when the warm sun is shining—when all is well. But it doesn’t always feel so good when the gray clouds roll in—when all is falling apart.
It’s easy to talk about the fun play-dates at the park and the cute things our children do.
But what about the harder moments of motherhood? What about the days when we feel overspent, worn down, and we’ve cried more tears than we’ve consumed actual water?
What about those days? What do we do with those days? Are we complaining if we talk about those days? Are we bad moms for having those days?
The messy moments of motherhood can make us vulnerable to feeling like we are failing moms. We feel guilty when our emotions aren’t rose-colored. We feel shame for experiencing feelings of frustration, sadness, and inadequacy. We are too ashamed to talk about the true rhythms of our hearts, so we stuff our feelings down deep where they boil inside of us.
We measure our worth based on how well behaved our kids are, how well they sleep at night, how well they do in school, how respectful and polite they are, and how many compliments we receive from others about them.
Many of us mamas—we are hard on ourselves. Some days we feel like we are carrying the weight of the world on our shoulders, and we just aren’t meant for that.
Our Creator beautifully wove us together and made us in His Image. And those emotions? He put them in us for a reason. He made us emotional creatures, with a perfect purpose in mind.
And our identity?
We are Daughters of The King. That is who we are, and we don’t take away from that our add to that.
Our worth is not one ounce defined by how well we think we measure up as stay-at-home-moms, working moms, wives, and homemakers. Our worth is not defined by who the world says we are. Our worth is not defined by our titles or how many kids we have.
Our worth is in Him.
When we come face to face with hard moments of motherhood, first we need to acknowledge that hardships are to be expected.
In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. ~ John 16:33 (NIV)
Jesus tells us that we will have hard times and notice what He says directly after…take heart! We tend to think of our hearts as connected with our emotions. So is Jesus telling us to run away from our emotions? No. He’s telling us that there is forever hope in what He did for us, which lifts the burden of our troubles.
He knew there would be times of discouragement in our lives. He cares about our feelings. And He wants us to know that our hearts can always beat with hope no matter how hard our circumstances are. The key is to stay rooted in Him.
Rather than allowing the hardships of motherhood to keep us in a pit, God wants us to bring our real hearts to Him so He can lift the heavy burden. He can handle our raw emotions.
He can transform the very thing that seems the hardest into something Holy.
He wants us to depend on Him, rely on Him, cling to Him, and rest in Him. He wants to comfort us and heal the broken spaces in us. He wants to show us just how much we are worth to Him—worth dying for. He wants us to remain in Him, so that we remain in hope.
You see mamas, sometimes God allows us to feel the hard because He wants us to feel Him. He wants to hold us. He wants us to know that HE is Who we need the very most. He wants us to know that even when we are at our worst, He loves us just the same.
We are not bad moms for having hard days. We are real moms. Real moms who need a Savior— we all need a Savior.
We don’t need to run away from the difficult days or let them defeat us. Instead, they can be opportunities to develop deeper intimacy with the One who has felt every emotion we will ever feel.
Sometimes coming undone is the start of God mending us back together.
After all, He makes beautiful things out of the dust.
So take heart!
When motherhood is hard, just maybe God is doing something Holy.
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